Saturday's Sarcastic Soapbox

A different version of the New Moon poster

Couple of things...

I like Taylor Lautner.

I think he did a great job in New Moon.

I appreciate all the hard work

he did to keep the role of Jacob Black.

But.

We all know he's standing on a box here.

(we've seen the picture)

And I get that they want to make him 

appear taller and more menacing.

But.

Taylor isn't as tall as Robert.

Everyone knows that.

No, Taylor isn't stumpy like Shorty Spice

(Yes, Oregano)

But.

Let's face it...

He's no Robert Pattinson.

Remember these pictures?

Kristen's legs wrapped around Roberts.

PLENTY of room in that limo.

But the thing the haters focused on was

Kristen's face.

Her 'bitch' face.

Now, I know she has one.

I'm rather fond of it.

I'm wearing my bitch face right now...

But the haters are always whining about 

how Kristen is so mean to Rob.

She's always making faces...

or interrupting him when he talks.

I say this.

I do that to my husband

all the time.

I mean...

If you are close and intimate with someone...

You do this without even thinking.

DH says something stupid...

Or makes no sense? 

I interrupt him.

DH tells the same story again (and again)

Using the same old jokes and lines...

I make a face.

It happens when you are close to someone.

When you have heard it all.

When you are comfortable enough

to be openly honest.

I think it shows how well 

Kristen KNOWS Robert.

Robert walking.

Just had to.

I tell ya...

Remember Me has some of the best

pictures of Rob.

Anyway.

I just wanted to address

the hypocrisy 

that lives in ROBland.

I mean...

there is SO much

it makes you dizzy... 

I get that people want to drive 

their point of view home.

Well...

I don't really get it...

But I'm used to it.

But there is a certain hater site

which will remain nameless...

(but you know who you are

because you are probably reading this) 

who criticize and insult

people who lurk at their site

to see what they have to say.

They say these lurkers are cowards...

and losers...

Yet.

They constantly talk about going to other sites

and prowling around...

Now, lurking is one thing...

Everyone goes to other public sites

and reads without commenting...

But a PRIVATE site

run by someone that they 

publicly skew and attack

on a daily basis?

They go so far...

that they PRETEND to be

someone who is a fan of Kristen's

Someone who believes in Rob/Kristen as a couple... 

and ask to be a member of this site...

For the sole reason of knowing what this person

has to say about Rob and Kristen.

They make fun of this person's knowledge...

They act like it means nothing. 

Yet they are so insecure...

so bitter and paranoid...

That they lie about who they are

because they are afraid of what she is going to say.

So they fucking SPY on her.

Not only is that hypocrisy at its finest...

That's pathetic.

And if you feel I'm writing about you

and your forum/blog?

Well...

I guess I am.

You know my favorite saying...

If the shoe fits...

Slide that bitch on.

Bye for now.